Well i didn't do it. I could bring myself to commit suicide today. But it doesnt change how messed up my life is. Im in constsnt pain over my ex who left me in 2016. I was mugged abd have panic attacks abd flash backs about it. And i had to watch an 11 year old girl die after falling off a wall whilst i was a youth worker. I couldn't do anything to help.

Ive dropoed out of university due to mental health. I couldn't take it after my ex left me. She had been cheating on me and suddenly cut all contact and dissapeared from my life after 8 years. Then she made false allegations against me that got me arrested until they cleared me of charges. I had to spend 21 hours in complete silence in a cell for no reason.

I now have nothing. For the last 2 years ive had therapy. Ive tried many medications. Ive attempted many times. Ive tried ti move on and meet new people. But im just lonely with no prospects of a future. No job. No friends. Nothing. Ive lost all interest in life and no matter what i do i constantly think about my ex. About how much i love her. She was abusive for 8 years but i still feel that way. All i want is to go back.

I don't know how to get better. I wabt a job i love. A partner who isnt abusive. Friends. I want a life. To be happy. But i dont know how. I cabt bring myself to attempt again it seems so please someone help me. How can i get better?