I know I'm mentally ill and I have been since the beginning of middle school. It has been about 6 years now? I struggled with depression, social anxiety, an eating disorder, etc. I've noticed some seemingly mundane symptoms. I started to have really inconsistent handwriting when I started middle school. I went from having consistently cute bubbly handwriting to really variable handwriting. My teacher has once accused me of having different ppl do my work for me since my handwriting differs a lot. It's dependent on my mood. Sometimes, it's bubbly and then in another class it'll be long and thin and then wide and spread out. And eventually it's no longer easy to read. I don't know what to do? The only time it's ever consistent is when I actively think about how I write, but it never lasts for long. I read online on multiple websites that it's a sign of instability. Does that mean I'm crazy? I know I'm doing better now. Much better than I did before. Mental illness runs in my family specifically on my dad's side. I think my dad and paternal grandmother also have it but idk exactly what it is? I've never been to therapy before, but my friends have been suggesting it all these years, but I'm scared and I don't like opening up so I've never gone before. I also shower infrequently and I feel super gross? I only shower twice a week. Sometimes I don't brush my teeth either, but I try to hide it by not talking to anyone. I'm sorry I just word vomited but I wanted to spill it all out before I forget.