I don't even know where to begin. Once a month, for ~2 weeks, this suffocating cloud wraps around my mind, clouding my perception of the world. It makes me feel isolated and alone, even though I know I'm not. I also have no energy to reach out to friends/family when this happens, and I'm a zombie at work.

I've been to therapy, and I believe have pretty good coping mechanisms...but they only work during my "good" half of the month. I've also seen a psychiatrist, and I know they've been through school and they try to help...but they just list the symptoms from a manual and prescribe meds like candy. It's really hard for me to trust their expertise.

I would take the meds if they were effective, but no one even knows how they work (no one really knows anything about the brain anyway), and what the long term side effects might be. Even the immediate side effects sound awful enough that it's a major deterrent for me.

Besides, I feel amazing during the follicular phase, taking meds would probably make me feel hypomanic then, at the very least. It's just now, this part of the month, where this deep sadness infiltrates my soul and I'm a teary mess.

Maybe this is normal, and I'm being a weakling.

I'm looking for words of advice or what has worked for you, if you experience this too.