So the last month or 2, I've done more laying or slouching (not sitting upright) on the couch than anything else. Binge watching shows all day, sleeping 12+ hours... Hell, I even missed Christmas with my family. The only other time I've ever been this sedentary was in jail, and even then I think I was generally more active, as I worked out daily, played 21 in the yard and even learned yoga.

I can't stand my girlfriend I'm living with but I'm unemployed and have no motivation to get a job so I don't have the financial means to move out. I'm more out of shape than I've ever been as an adult with no motivation to exercise or do anything physical--in a way, that just makes me feel worse as it reminds me how weak I've become.

I've never in my life given less of a damn about anything and everything than I do now and I don't want to stop. The only time I'm active/functional is when I'm on a bender. Oh such fun. I don't even have the motivation to proofread/add all the relevant detail to this post so I'm done