I broke up with my boyfriend of 3 and a half years around 6 months ago, however we were still living and spending a lot of time together 3 months ago. We had a drunken night where he told me he still loved me. Yet denied it when I told him about him about it a month later. I blocked him from my life 2 months ago yet I still love him dearly.

I recently found out from a friend that his drug use has become worse than usual and he has got a girlfriend 6 years younger than him. I was pretty much abused by older men when I was younger which has made him always extremely funny about friends/girlfriends with bigger age gaps. The breakup has been extremely hard for me due to the fact I have severe mental health problems and at times he was basically my carer.

I also tried to get over the fact by meeting someone on tinder, he seemed overly interested in me, probably preyed on the fact I was vulnerable, used me for sex then barely spoke to me again. I blocked his details as well.

This made me relapse from a 35 day clean streak without alcohol and I've there for been drunk for the good part of 4 days. Does anybody have any advice in how to get over a relationship and to stop seeking validation from men because it sometimes seems it is the main focus in my life. My mental health problems make me extremely erratic and at the moment it's the only thing I can have on my mind. I was doing reasonably ok when we had no contact, but to find out he has a new gf completely crushed me, I think because I am constantly thinking what does she have that I don't.

Tl;dr attempting to get over a breakup, alcoholism, mental health